I’ve been spending quite a bit of time of late helping clients upgrade their support teams.
Support teams are beneficial because we can’t do everything ourselves and the people you may already have supporting you most likely can’t support you in all the ways you need.
I’m guessing you already have people on your support team – a doctor, a dentist and friends or family members to talk to. These and other people like them represent basic support necessary for our survival.
But what if you’re ready to move beyond survival and are looking to thrive?
If thriving is the goal, it’s time to upgrade your support network. If you’re ready to make changes with respect to your health, a personal trainer or a nutritionist could support you. If you struggle with money management, working with a financial coach could have a positive impact on your bottom line. If you’re impacted by a brain-based challenge, like ADHD you could likely benefit from the support of an ADHD coach or professional organizer who specializes in ADHD clients. You may even want to consider a therapist to support you with your emotional work.
Now before you throw out an objection like “that much support is a cop-out,” let me say that seeking support and building a support team is not a cop-out. Instead, seeking support is simply admitting you can’t do everything. (Who can really?) Seeking support is not an admission of weakness, but rather an acknowledgement of your strengths. For example, I am not a lesser person because I don’t clean my house. I know cleaning has never been a strength of mine, and if I’m paying someone to come in every couple of weeks to clean I am freeing up my time to focus on other areas where my strengths lie.
If you feel you could never afford the support you need, I urge you to think about what it’s costing you to not hire the support you need. Would it be worth it for you to pay someone to help you get some procedures in place that resulted in fewer bounced checks and fewer bank fees? What would it be worth to have someone help you set up a budget and learn better money management so you can get ahead financially instead of living paycheck to paycheck? What would it be worth to get better organized so you’re not wasting time looking for things and wasting money re-buying things you have but can’t find?
So what are some of the benefits to creating a support team for yourself?
First, is having the right person in place when a situation arises. As an organizer coach, I help my clients in lots of ways, but I understand I can’t be all things to my clients, any more than a therapist, personal trainer or financial coach could be all things to the people they work with. Professionals are trained to do different things. So, if my client is also supported by a therapist and in a coaching session begins to struggle with a topic better suited for therapy, I can suggest she brings up the topic with her therapist, instead of just having to decline speaking with her about it. The result; my client is more fully supported.
Another benefit of using a team approach is exposure to different perspectives about your challenges, such as ADHD. For example, each of us who works in the field of ADHD comes at his or her specialty from a slightly different perspective. Those perspectives are molded by personal history with ADHD, educational background and our client experiences. Your ADHD coach, therapist, psychiatrist, etc are all likely to have perspectives they are willing to share with you. You’ll likely become a better advocate for yourself the more you learn from your various team members.
Who’s currently on your support team? Who else might you add to become better supported? Most importantly what might be possible for you with more support?
If you’re interested in learning more about the benefits of creating a support team give me a call and we can discuss.
The support team is essential. It can be made up of professionals like organizers, coaches, therapists, house help, or it can be friends, family or colleagues. Support comes in many ways, but as you said, no one can do everything by themselves. Enlisting help acknowledges that. More and more I’m subscribing to this. It’s easy not to when you’re a solo-preneur. But it’s essential to get over yourself and build that team. If not, you can quickly burnout. More than that, you get to tap into the expertise and experience of others, which is a huge benefit. My latest addition… Read more »
Linda, I agree, it’s not easy! I recently hired the wonderfully talented Janet Barclay to support me and the support she has provided so far has been invaluable. Congratulations to you for enlisting someone to help you manage the details of your trip and relieving stress that I’m guessing can now be replaced with excitement! Thanks again for your comment!
Thank you for the shout-out, Andrea – and for the excellent article.
I also pay for someone to clean my home, and if I occasionally feel guilty that I *should* be doing it myself, it’s much better than looking around at dust and feeling guilty about not cleaning it – plus it actually gets done, and well!
Janet, You’re most welcome for the well deserved shout-out. You raise a good point – If you are *shoulding* on yourself that is probably a good cue to consider if support might be beneficial. Thanks for commenting!
Thank you for the reminder Andrea:-) Isn’t it amazing that most of us don’t even think in terms of support? We keep going up against a wall, trying to make things happen and prove we can do it all. It’s insanity in action. Truth is, we can’t do it all and do it right. We either have to accept the wisdom of dropping some balls or ask for help. Good luck in Chicago next month and keep on reminding us:-)
Yota, You’re right, it is “insanity in action” and I find it fascinating how often WE have have to be reminded of this. I say WE because I am far from immune when it comes to needing to be reminded. Though I know I have made progress in this area, I have a long way to go. What’s helps me most is remembering that just because I could do something doesn’t mean I have to to do it. Thanks for the good wishes for Chicago! Sue and I are looking forward to it.
[…] November, my colleague, Andrea Sharb, ACC Coach and I present at CHADD* a newly designed workshop, called “Creating the Best Team for Your […]
Great point regarding assessing the “costs” of building your support team. After a cost-benefit analysis, I would suspect (for most of us) the costs of NOT building in supports would be a lot greater. The initial investment of financial costs is usually reimbursed down the line in other forms – increased productivity, personal growth … happiness, I dare say! We don’t seem to question the notion of getting our hair professionally cut/colored/etc… yet, technically, we all could do that ourselves. Just because we can, doesn’t mean we should!
Andrea, so glad you dropped in to comment again! Yes, the costs of not building can often end up exceeding the cost of hiring – goodness knows I’ve learned that lesson over the years! I checked out your blog this morning and LOVE your Manifesto!
Thank you very much Andrea!
[…] November, my colleague, Andrea Sharb, ACC Coach and I present at CHADD* a newly designed workshop, called “Creating the Best Team for Your […]
Hi. Andrea !
My favorite phrase was this unique one that turns things from what we’d usually hear or think:
“Seeking support is not an admission of weakness, but rather an acknowledgement of your strengths.”
It takes strength, and courage, and talking to a spouse about needed support and more. It also I suppose can be the very beginning of accepting a diagnosis of ADHD, a step forward.
Thank you –
~Sue
Thanks for your comment Sue and for your sponsorship of Janet’s blog posting. I have witnessed numerous times that acceptance of one’s brain based challenges often goes hand in hand with willingness to seek additional support. I also agree wholeheartedly with you that it takes courage to ask for that support and I acknowledge those who are open to seeking support in hopes of creating a different experience for themselves.